And So It Begins....
I'm not excited about it at all. In fact I'm really dreading it. The running around and the craziness that it entails. I know it's coming. I hear other parents describe how it affects their evenings and weekends and I cringe. I already have one foot within its grasp and am slowly being pulled in. I will try to fight but already I can feel its breath hot upon my mind. I know it's coming.
Jammin' started T-ball and with that fateful move I have officially entered my role as chauffeur, cheering section, and scheduling queen. Already I can see the dark side of parenting; the hectic evenings, the long Saturdays, the empty gas tanks, and the over-scheduled family.
I've been at it for sometime already, but not quite pulled in. Soon, Buttercup's one day a week dance class will turn into two days a week. Jammin's 2 games a week T-ball will soon be 2 long games of Baseball plus a practice. Then there will be soccer, basketball, piano lessons, karate, meeting up with friends, music recitals, Tournaments, and competitions. I know it's coming.
Don't get me wrong, I LOVE watching my kids in their act
ivities. Buttercup dances with delight. Jammin' made 2 outs in his first T-ball game. I encourage my children to try new things and I want them to have fun while they learn. I want them to experience all that life has to offer. But I also know that in doing so my life, as I know it, will end.
I don't plan on cramming their schedules so full they won't have time to be "just kids". But one activity per child turns into a lot of running around and parental commitment. No longer will I have free Saturdays to lounge around. My "hang out on the couch" weekday evenings will be over - long before I am ready to say good-bye to them. I know it's coming.
As my children get older I can see the busyness come; When I filled out forms for Fall 07 Soccer (already?), when I wrote out the preschool application for the MWF class, and as I paid money for summer ballet and week-long karate camp.
I watch the parents with older children hustle and bustle. I cringe and will await my fate. I know its coming. There is nothing I can do to stop it. Am I ready. No, but like a tidal wave, I will try and ride it out. And maybe, just maybe, I will actually enjoy some of it along the way.
That's about the only reason I may not fight for another child in my life: the fear of that frenzied existance I see other mommies live.
Although I don't want to deny any child of mine an opportunity...
Ah, whadaya do?!!
Posted by:Stephanie | May 01, 2007 at 11:31 PM
You're right Karmyn................
And there is nothing you can do about it!! It will all be over in about 12 years or so..............
Posted by:Sally | May 01, 2007 at 11:35 PM
But it's worth it! Even with five children, and think of the blogs!!!
Posted by:Sally | May 01, 2007 at 11:37 PM
I hear you about the scheduling. It's hard to find a balance between not getting them involved enough, and being too involved. Last year the kids took swimming. Unfortunately that wasn't enough since I was at work a lot so they were bored. This year they're going to a science day camp, gymnastics, and hopefully swimming again. Just think of all the pictures you'll be able to post!!!
Posted by:Sunrunner | May 01, 2007 at 11:50 PM
Wow, cool uniform! Hey I have a question...it looks like Jammin' is playing first base, but if he is, he's playing in foul territory. Is that the case, or is a ball actually coming his way? I can't tell what's going on by the baserunner, he may be just dorking off, or his coach is telling him to stay put.
Posted by:Willowtree | May 02, 2007 at 02:32 AM
From one who's there now...
Stay true to one activity per child, at a time. At times you will feel pressure (from within AND without) to do more. No. Learn to love that word, learn to use it, and perhaps the hardest customer you'll have to turn down is YOURSELF!
You'll find you enjoy the company of other parents...you're traveling the same road together.
These type things are teaching your children life skills (i.e., how to function as a team, how to lose graciously, how to win graciously, etc.); it provides illustrations as you guide and train them....
FORGIVE ME if I sound like a knowitall mom, I know you "know" this stuff, I'm just trying to remind you :).
Posted by:Robin | May 02, 2007 at 04:12 AM
When I was in school, my parents were at every softball game, basketball game, and track meet from the time I was in 3rd grade until I graduated. It meant so much to me knowing they were in the stands... it got to the point that I thought I wouldn't perform well without them there.
It was a lot for them to do with four kids... but they made it a point to be there.
So... ride out the wave, Karmyn. Your kids will be glad you did!
Posted by:Jodi | May 02, 2007 at 05:18 AM
remember when I had the bud and the r/h girl for 4 months.
I lost 10 lbs
Posted by:Pamela | May 02, 2007 at 07:31 AM
Willowtree - Yes, the ball is coming towards Jammin. These T-ballers are pretty slow at getting the ball to first base!!! Occasionally, they manage to make an out (which makes me VERY excited).
Oh - and just so everyone knows - He's a Yankee this year.
Posted by:Karmyn R | May 02, 2007 at 08:27 AM
Yeah, it begins... but after a few errors and clumps of confusion, we've started to figure out our routines and such a bit better around here. Like, we *never* choose weekend-only activities. At some point, I imagine this will be inevitable, and we'll have to deal with it then - but for now, we have activities on weeknights, and the occasional single Saturday. It may not seem like a big deal, but not feeling able to take a weekend away, EVER, is such a nightmare.
And one-activity-per-child.
And no-activities-per-children-in-diapers, no matter HOW much they want to be like their big sisters.
The fun part for me has been to keep my little guy happy and entertained during his sister's practices and games, while still paying adequate attention to her. It's hit-or-miss... with emphasis on miss.
Posted by:Kate | May 02, 2007 at 08:57 AM
Yes Sister this is where it starts.
I know you are not searching for advice, and I hate being given advice when I didn't ask for it.
However I am just a good enough friend to give it to you anyway!
Make time for meals together. It seems that is what keeps our family together. Even if I bring home take out, we still sit at the table together and eat it.
Take lots of pictures. His voice will be deep, he will be taller than you are and have hairy armpits before you know it. Your baby will grow up and he will think he is too big to sit on your lap. These things I am resisting.
Posted by:Vicki | May 02, 2007 at 10:25 AM
He looks great in his kit. Beccy can tell you about ferrying kids to different activities, the real fun come when they need to be in two different places at the same time.
Posted by:chrisb | May 02, 2007 at 10:41 AM
and to continue mums words...and you only have one car! By 12 they learn independence, phew!
Posted by:beccy | May 02, 2007 at 02:22 PM
Jeez! I wish I was out there playing t-ball with those kids ... instead of sitting by the window watching the Spanish-speaking landscapers cut the grass.
Posted by:Lulu (Dan's cat) | May 02, 2007 at 02:56 PM
I'm right there with ya sister!! We are definitely keeping it to one activity per child. But with four boys... you can imagine how my voice will be lost before I get through with the first two weeks of the soccer season.
We already have three in soccer.
But I do so love soccer. And Lord knows I need to get away from my computer and from the house period more than I do now. LOL! Winter is so long here I am just glad when we can go outside at all!
Posted by:nancypants | May 02, 2007 at 03:21 PM
I'm right there with ya sister!! We are definitely keeping it to one activity per child. But with four boys... you can imagine how my voice will be lost before I get through with the first two weeks of the soccer season.
We already have three in soccer.
But I do so love soccer. And Lord knows I need to get away from my computer and from the house period more than I do now. LOL! Winter is so long here I am just glad when we can go outside at all!
Posted by:nancypants | May 02, 2007 at 03:21 PM
I hear ya, girl!
Posted by:melissa | May 02, 2007 at 05:14 PM
Good luck!!
Posted by:wolfbaby | May 03, 2007 at 11:04 AM
The alternative is not allowing the kids to participate in ANY activities and then having to listen to them saying, "Mom, I'm bored!" all the time. You can't win for losing...
I know you dread this, judging by the comment you made on my post about last weekend's craziness. It is hectic, it's exhausting, and it's time-consuming, but you're right about something else - it's also a wonderful experience for the kids and for us as parents, too. My kids love that I'm in the stands, cheering them on. And they know I'm extremely proud of their efforts.
Posted by:Desert Songbird | May 04, 2007 at 10:50 AM
Yes, it is coming. Get reading for the parents who do not bring their children to the practices with water or proper equipment, parents who leave their children in "your" care as they drive off, parents you have to track down for fundraising money, parents who lose the team photograph packet . . .
Yes, it is bad. You do it in the hopes of instilling a lifelong interest in physical activity and team sports in your children. Its just one of the prices we pay for being parents.
Here from BCs.
Posted by:CyberCelt | May 06, 2007 at 09:14 AM
best of luck to ya! this was a very enjoyable post!
Posted by:angel | May 13, 2007 at 01:21 PM