A Conversation On Death and Panties
Recently, my husband, Dave, brought home four huge bags full of clothes that had belonged to his cousin, Mark. My in-laws believe in using everything up. Nothing should go to waste. Even though I was a little weirded-out to have bags of a dead-man's clothing, Dave didn't mind. There were a lot of nice clothes in those bags.
Somehow, it became my job to go through them and pick out clothes I thought would fit Dave. Mainly I picked the nicest shirts and shorts. The pants were out. A 32"L will not fit my husband's 6'5" frame. He needs a 36" length.
In the end, I was left with three large bags of clothes to give to GoodWill. My husband was quite shocked.
"Why are you getting rid of so much?" He asked.
"Well, there really wasn't a lot in there that would fit you." I replied.
"I thought there was a whole bag of shorts."
"No" I shook my head. "The rest of that bag was socks and underwear."
My husband thought about this for a moment. "I guess I could use more socks and underwear."
"No way. That's just gross."
"What's gross?"
"Wearing other people's underwear. That's just gross. yuck." I shook my head. I can't think of anything worse except using someone else's toothbrush.
"Why is it gross if they have been washed?" My husband sees nothing wrong with this.
"It's bad enough to go through his clothes. It kind of creeps me out for some reason, but to wear his underwear? Enough is enough. If you need underwear, I will buy you new ones, okay? I am NOT going to let you wear used underwear."
My husband laughed.
And that is when it became clear to me.
"Honey, when I die, the FIRST thing I want you to do is to open my dresser and get rid of all my panties."
"What?" He laughs some more.
"No, I'm serious. Promise me you'll get rid of them. Burn them if you must."
He laughs some more.
"Promise me, please. After I exhale my last breath run to the bedroom and get rid of them. I don't want anyone else to ever wear them or even think about wearing them."
"That's just because your panties are old and holey."
I just glared and made him promise me one more time. I'm serious. I want those panties BURNED.
Ahhh, hand me down undies... I remember those days- with great distaste.
You have holy panties? maybe you could sell them on ebay. The grilled cheese lady made a lot of money ya know. ;)
Posted by: Mary (mert) | April 27, 2007 at 10:27 AM
Oh, yes...that defintely falls into the ICK category! LOL...some people's families =)
Posted by: Tracey | April 22, 2007 at 06:13 PM
Oh, I agree. Something just doesn't seem right about wearing someone elses underwear.
Posted by: Arkansas Songbird | April 21, 2007 at 06:45 PM
This is too funny.
And yet, funnier still, is that this is the second blog I've read tonight featuring a story about panties. Specifically getting rid of panties! LOL! What are the odds?
Posted by: nancypants | April 21, 2007 at 06:41 PM
I once made my ex-husband promise to immediately throw out all undergarments and any old/comfy jammies/t-shirts/shorts after I had seen a tv show where the lady died and friends came over to "visit" for a memorial service and ended up going thru her closet. I vowed then and there that none of my friends would see my old, full of holes, etc t-shirts and shorts and my undies.
Posted by: Margaret | April 21, 2007 at 06:29 PM
ha ha very funny but I agree underwear is not for recycling except maybe for young kids.
Posted by: Chrisb | April 21, 2007 at 03:53 PM
I always debate about giving the kids barely worn under pants to goodwill when they out grow them.
But I see your point. I want mine burned!!
Posted by: Devon | April 21, 2007 at 03:44 PM
Up until moments ago, I wanted to be buried with my shoes. Now, I want to be buried with my shoes and my panties.
Posted by: Mist 1 | April 20, 2007 at 08:15 PM
Burn dem panties, girl.
Holla,
Krazee Eyez Killa
Posted by: Krazee Eyez Killa | April 20, 2007 at 07:02 PM
This is an issue I've had with MDW for years. She keeps trying to throw out my underwear, and I keep telling her they only smell like someone has died in them.
Posted by: Willowtree | April 20, 2007 at 06:19 PM
ok i can deal with all of that cept the used underwear.. ewwww thats just wrong.. and I agree sounds like a good reason to go to victorias secret;) BTW there stuff does last for e v e r...
I do wear my mom's shirts..it makes me feel better sometimes..
Posted by: wolfbaby | April 20, 2007 at 06:07 PM
LOL. I agree. I would never wear someone else's.
Yet my youngest boy (age 4) thinks it's cool to get his big brother's underwear, LOL.
Just this morning my boys had a major fit because somehow the 7 yr old ran out of clean undies and had to wear a pair belonging to the 9 yr old. Yuck. The 7 yr old wasn't happy about it, and I'm sure the 9 yr old will NEVER wear them again.
Posted by: momto3cubs | April 20, 2007 at 03:53 PM
being the youngest of 8 ... on a barely just making it farm... I never knew any different. When my sis's grew taller, I got whatever didn't fit and wore it.
What's that old saying:
Use it up. Wear it Out. Make it do, or do without!!! R.E.C.Y.L.E
Bwaaaahahaaahahaa
Posted by: Pamela | April 20, 2007 at 01:23 PM
It isn't so much the grossness of used underwear that gets to me, it's that it's so depressing.
Posted by: Angelina | April 20, 2007 at 12:54 PM
men, why are they like this?
Posted by: BarnGoddess | April 20, 2007 at 12:14 PM
It's just bad Karm-a.
Posted by: Matt | April 20, 2007 at 11:49 AM
Um, sounds like someone needs to get to the Victoria's Secret, Karm.
Seriously. Gross.
Posted by: Matt | April 20, 2007 at 11:48 AM
A compelling argument for going commando ;)!
Posted by: Robin | April 20, 2007 at 09:12 AM
Buy new panties and wear ONLY Panties for 2 nights while you sleep. See what happens.
My inlaws do the same thing. What's up with them? With them it's coats. I have so many coats and jackets in my entry way closet that sometimes you can't shut the door! How many jackets do we need? Brian says, "they are for company." Hmmm.. that doesn't make much sense either.
Posted by: Vicki | April 20, 2007 at 09:10 AM
haha!! things I never thought about!! Now you've given me more reason to clean up this mess of mine...LOL
Posted by: claudia | April 20, 2007 at 08:05 AM
I'm so with you on not wearing anyone elses underwear, or anyone else wearing mine!
Posted by: beccy | April 20, 2007 at 07:38 AM
Socks? Maybe. Underwear? Definitely not.
BTW - you should go buy yourself new panties.
Oh, and why are men's undergarments called "underwear" when women's undergarments are called "panties?"
Hmmm....
Posted by: Desert Songbird | April 20, 2007 at 06:51 AM
Too funny! But it's also funny that you're giving those same socks and underwear to Goodwill for someone else to wear. I have to agree though, the thought of my husband wearing someone else's underwear.... EWWWW, not a visual I can handle.
Posted by: Simply Jenn | April 20, 2007 at 06:32 AM
This may make me shallow, but, EW creepy dead guy clothes. Shudder. I don't think I would have had the will to go through the bags of stuff, so kudos to you.
Just in case, I'm going to check with my DH tonight to make sure we are clear on the panty issue as well.
Posted by: Sabrina | April 20, 2007 at 05:35 AM
That's so funny!!
But I have to agree with you... it doesn't matter how many times you wash them... they are still someone else's underwear!!
Posted by: Jodi | April 20, 2007 at 05:16 AM